Making the Decision to Cut

Elective surgery: two words I didn't think were in my vocabulary.   Certainly not in my physical universe.

And yet, I tried the idea on like a new bra, carefully considering every angle, the overall effect, the feel of it against my skin.

I gave the concept room in my brain to bang around the empty corners for over 3 years.  I squashed down the execution to tend to several tragic life events.  Then I finally took the idea out of my head and gave it a checkbook.

I bought myself a perkier pair of breasts.

In retrospect I wonder if I ever really intended to execute on the notion or if I just got caught up in the planning and was ultimately snowballed by the effort into the surgery room.

Either way, here I am, Day 3 Post-Op, blogging about my adventures in plastic surgery.

Time, gravity, weight ... none of these things were on my side.  

My age alone was likely cause enough for having a breast lift.  Add in decades of high impact aerobics and pile on the effects of 65 lbs of weight loss a dozen years ago and my boobs were screaming for help.

With three friends that had all gone under the knife for similar surgeries, I used my social network to get a feel for what the process and results would be like.  None of that stacked up to reality.

My reality is that my husband is living with cancer and every day is a new exercise in coping and moving forward.

My reality is that two crushed vertebrae is painful on a minute by minute basis.

My reality is that a high stress job never lets you take time off and never lets you have a moment of peace.

As the thought coalesced in my head my quest to find the most talented surgeon began.  Yelp reviews were hugely helpful in eliminating surgeons (automatically crossed off anyone that had already been sued for disfigurement, LOL).  Word of mouth led me to the two best doctors: one I just didn't gel with and the other was instant bonding.

Life was never going to line up and hold still for me so that I could do something for myself so I sucked it up and put the surgery on the books.